While it takes every effort I have to admit this, it’s time I came out of the Vera Wang and Armani Privé filled closet and say it: I LOVE WATCHING THE OSCARS.... Oh, I can feel the shame spreading through me like the dye they inject people with before a cat scan, but it’s time I came clean.
This Hollywood award-giving ritual has been my guilty pleasure since I was a little girl. My mum would always ask me if I wanted to watch it with her, to which I would reply “no way lady, that’s soooo boring” then I’d go upstairs and watch it alone on another TV, like the sad little boy reading the ‘Never-ending Story’ book in his attic under a sheet.
Just like a nun who's had a one night stand with a rock-star, I vowed never to let people find out... find out just what a girl I am when it came to the biggest night in Hollywood, the tears I cry at the speeches, the ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ that escape my mouth when gazing doe-eyed at the flowing frocks, and perhaps worst of all, the “who?” that I absent-mindedly utter when they go on about ‘People we’ve lost this year’.
As I’ve grown older, this surreptitious affair with the Academy Awards has been harder and harder to conceal from people, especially as I have annoying friends who like to throw ‘Oscar Parties’ that are usually tied in with some sort of compulsory fancy-dress theme, actually, the fancy-dress only started after I’d turned down so many invitations that they started to bribe me (fancy dress is like my crack, I freakin love dressing up). It’s just one betrayal after another as I tell them all I have something else on that night, or I have to work etc, when really I spend all day cleaning or shopping to put my mind off it, then go and buy copious amounts of doritoes and chicken strips, and enough vodka and diet coke to make the guy at the store think I’m having a party. Then I turn off my phone, turn off the lights and settle in for the night in my little bubble of anti-social bliss.
It’s the next day that’s possibly the hardest, hearing people at work talk about the Best actress-winner’s speech and not being able to go “oh my god oh my god, I was in tears, and her DRESS! Totally amazing!” and instead just say “oh yeah? were the Oscars on last night, hmm whatever”.
It feels so good to finally be able to say “This is who am I am world, and I’m proud of it, and two gold fingers to you if you don’t it”
So I guess the statue’s out of the bag now.
Just like a nun who's had a one night stand with a rock-star, I vowed never to let people find out... find out just what a girl I am when it came to the biggest night in Hollywood, the tears I cry at the speeches, the ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ that escape my mouth when gazing doe-eyed at the flowing frocks, and perhaps worst of all, the “who?” that I absent-mindedly utter when they go on about ‘People we’ve lost this year’.
As I’ve grown older, this surreptitious affair with the Academy Awards has been harder and harder to conceal from people, especially as I have annoying friends who like to throw ‘Oscar Parties’ that are usually tied in with some sort of compulsory fancy-dress theme, actually, the fancy-dress only started after I’d turned down so many invitations that they started to bribe me (fancy dress is like my crack, I freakin love dressing up). It’s just one betrayal after another as I tell them all I have something else on that night, or I have to work etc, when really I spend all day cleaning or shopping to put my mind off it, then go and buy copious amounts of doritoes and chicken strips, and enough vodka and diet coke to make the guy at the store think I’m having a party. Then I turn off my phone, turn off the lights and settle in for the night in my little bubble of anti-social bliss.
It’s the next day that’s possibly the hardest, hearing people at work talk about the Best actress-winner’s speech and not being able to go “oh my god oh my god, I was in tears, and her DRESS! Totally amazing!” and instead just say “oh yeah? were the Oscars on last night, hmm whatever”.
It feels so good to finally be able to say “This is who am I am world, and I’m proud of it, and two gold fingers to you if you don’t it”
So I guess the statue’s out of the bag now.
Peace and Gold Statues!
xxxx
Peej
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